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25 Hours

 

On the weekend I stated that I was pretty pleased we were given an extra hour on Sunday. That is exactly how long it took me to change the time display on my clock radio, microwave, stove, the cars, an old nostalgic VCR and the seven other devices that needed my strong technical skill to perform this simple task.

Well many of us may have had less difficulty than I, turning our non-automatic clocks backwards on the weekend as you tried to keep your life’s biometric synchronicity going, But this little annual task got me thinking. Or is that got me to thinking?  I think so little these days, I struggle to express this in written form.  Perhaps if I change the tense…  I was thinking North America insists that we save precious daylight during the winter months, to give the illusion that cold sunlight improves one’s attitude, when the blizzards arrive.

We did not only gain an extra hour on Sunday, we also gained an extra day, as 2016 was a leap year.   Most of us desperately try to ignore the generous gift of 25 extra hours this year. A few of us, we sarcastically call “Responsible Citizens” ask the responsible question, “What did I accomplish with my extra 25 hours this year?”  Responsible citizens also ensure their dugout shelter in the back yard is fully stocked, as the inevitable Zombie war draws nearer.

Time can be your enemy if you do not plan well. This is better expressed with that tired cliché “People don’t plan to fail, they fail to plan”. Currently I am working on my own cliché to better represent the current dynamic at my place of work. “People don’t plan to annoy me but they do.”

I have been told that this annual clock turning outcome is not called “Daylight Savings Time” but more correctly “Daylight Saving Time”. I use the plural version because I believe the effort our sun makes in contraction and expansion of sunlight during winter, is more than worthy of the plural form. As I am continually corrected on my mispronunciation of this event, I am comforted by silently chanting, “People don’t plan to annoy me but they do”.

I have addressed this before https://breakingwell.com/2016/02/28/leap-year-of-faith/, but not with the severe scrutiny of today. I surveyed millions of people to get a sense of their impressive acts but got zero replies. Then I realized I forgot to hit the send button.

With this quadrennial event, I feel it is a public service to assess how others have wasted this precious gift of time. With 25 hours I believe it is possible to do 25 things that could enrich you life. Here in descending order, are the top 25 remarkable things I have done with that time this year.  You will get another chance in four years to get a lot more done, as I once again have become an inspiration for you.

To be clear, I do not share this to make you feel bad about how lazy you have been this year. I share this to inspire you and hope you will become a little less irresponsible four years from now.

25       Napped

24       Rearranged my cutlery drawer.

23       Replaced the batteries in the remote control I found in the cushions.

22       Committed to exercising more frequently, realizing once a year is more frequently.

21       Thought about being more charitable this year.

20       Neatly rearranged boxes on the floor, so the hoarder channel would stop coming to my front door with  cameras.

19       Found my nap was less reenergizing than it should have been, so I napped again.

18       Got my email inbox down from 6,333 unread messages to an impressive 6,144 unread messages.

17       Randomly called people to gain greater empathy for telemarketers.

16       I was running out of time so I skipped number 16.

15       Sharpened some pencils I found in the cutlery drawer.

14       Rearranged my Hall and Oates records, this time in alphabetical order.

13       Holy crap I am only half way there.

12       Thought seriously about washing my car but as a fair compromise, I put on the dishwasher with the car floor mats on the top shelf.

11       Revised item 21 and committed to being less charitable, but much more hygienic this year.

10       Reviewed my current investments and consumed many half opened bottles from the liquor cabinet… and then I called an old girlfriend.

9          With the effects of the liquor I reedited my resignation letter, that I will send when I sober up.

8          Considered thanking people who have done so much for me, but unfortunately found an interesting show on Netflix I just had to watch.

7          Prepared to enroll in Yoga, ballroom dancing and knitting lessons with my typical enthusiastic zeal. Now there is yarn all over the house.

6          I listed in priority the grudges I have with other people, including the dead ones. Even those with Alzheimer’s forget everything but the grudge.

5          Finalized the week’s grocery list remembering we are surprisingly low on our Yam supply.

4          Realized my dream of being a major league shortstop is probably no longer realistic, as I can’t seem to find my baseball glove.

3          Got closer to completing my Time Machine project in my basement though I am still looking for a cheaper price for a flux capacitor on EBay.

2          Rearranged my shelves of technology. The Betamax recorder is now underneath the 8 Track player but above my Segway and Palm Pilot.

1          Reviewed my To Do list for the next Leap Year.

Okay your turn. Please have your list to me not later than February 29th 2020.

 

Cue the Blong:  You know sometimes you need happy, danceable music to perform even the simplest task. I hope this helps.  It is also a perfect formula to get your songs on iTunes.

 

 

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